Ever since I can remember, my mom has been a person of faith. She’s always been a prayer warrior, an avid student of The Bible through study and memorization, and one who has sought to lead others to Christ. My mom loved to lead the children’s choir in church when I was a kid, she’s led countless Bible studies, and has had a loving heart for marginalized or disadvantaged people. Her paintings subtly reflect Christian messaging and her love of God’s creations.
She loved the unlovable. She hated the sin, but loved the sinner. I can still hear her singing the words “red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in his sight”.
Her mission field was planet Earth. The golf course, the swimming pool, her kid’s sporting events, her neighborhood, a local university’s foreign student hosting program, family gatherings, the hospital, you name it. She talked about Jesus until she could talk no more.
I was also recently reflecting on my mom’s insistence that we attend vacation Bible school (VBS) every summer when we were kids. I don’t recall ever wanting to go, especially since VBS started immediately following the never-ending elementary school year. In my mind, it was summer break, and that meant “do what I want, when I want”. It was only after VBS that summer was in full swing. Reflecting on it now though, I recall having fun and learning at VBS even though it wasn’t my decision to go.
Same with church on Sundays. I used to pretend I was sleeping or be as quiet as possible on Sunday mornings with the hope that my mom would somehow forget to go to church or decide that I didn’t need to go, yet that never happened.
Regardless of any of the decisions she made for us that I didn’t like, I know now it was 100% meant for the spiritual growth of my father, my sisters, and me. What has marked her entire life is she never gave up on us nor her God, no matter what happened. There were certainly times when frustrated with each of us she rightfully gave everything over to God, but this didn’t mean she gave up.
My mom has suffered from back pain for as long as I can remember. She’s also suffered from foot pain and numbness. She’s also had to cope with severe depression and bipolar disorder with much of this a mystery to many as the related behaviors have been difficult for us to understand. Equal to or worse than the physical and mental suffering, my mom grew up in a home where she felt unloved and not valued. I believe her heart for the downtrodden and outsiders is much because she identifies with these people groups. In parallel, she’s experienced the unfathomable love of Christ her entire life so she’s wanted others to feel the same love, no matter how unloved they are by the people of this earth.
As she nears the end, she has trouble communicating, walking, eating, and other normal activities. Her time is near however with each day there is peace in knowing Heaven will soon gain another beautiful soul, and her pain and sorrow will turn into eternal joy.
I love you mom.
Today’s reading: Ecclesiastes 10-12; 2 Timothy 4