He probably blamed himself. Can you picture him? The blind beggar, sitting, all alone. Cold, hungry, and lonely. He could hear people talking as they passed by. They questioned what was wrong. They mocked him. They made up stories. Every conversation reminded him that he was useless. Every remark reinforced his belief that he was bad. For a while, the blind man fought it. He wondered what he could have possibly done wrong. Why, did he deserve this?
In the moments that others engaged him in conversation, the answer was always the same. “you must have done something” they would say. “Think hard. You dont remember doing anything sinful?” As the blind man searched his heart, he would cry out, “no, nothing.” “Well,” they retorted, “if not you, then it must have been your father. Clearly, you are paying for someone’s sin.”
Most of the time, he was just alone. Alone with his thoughts and heavy heart. His hope for a normal life, productive and useful, was gone. He would never be like everyone else. Over time, he decided, they are right. I’ll just accept what I have. “There is no sense in trying harder, no benefit to leaning in.”
I wonder if that is real for all of us. The blind man had an ailment that kept him from experiencing a full and meaningful life. It was something that he could not overcome. Nobody else could help him either. Like the blind beggar, we are unable to view the thoughts and actions that shape our lives objectively. When we look closely, we will develop reasons why it just wont work for us. Ironically, those reasons, become exactly what keeps us from moving forward. They are the things that keep us from becoming who God created us to be.
Just like the blind man, we cannot find comfort or assistance from other people. We definitely cannot find it inside of ourselves. We need someone to believe in us. Actually, we need something more than belief. We need someone that knows us, intimately, just like Jesus knew the blind man. Jesus stopped and provided exactly what was needed.
I wonder, if the blind man knew what sight would bring him. Maybe he thought about new and amazing opportunities, or maybe that it would open the door to love and companionship. It could be that comfort and ease of life were enough for him. Whatever it was, I wonder if he was surprised at what he got. He didn’t get any of those. Instead, he got Jesus, telling him to be a witness. To tell the world of his experience. It didn’t make sense. Of course he would tell the world. In fact, he wanted to shout it from the mountaintops. He would make sure that everyone knew it was Jesus Christ that healed him. He is why he sees.
What the blind beggar didn’t know and didn’t think about was that this is who he was created to be. Full of passion, full of love, hope and joy. These were the fruits that had been hidden away for so long. This is what Jesus unlocked in his life. For the first time, he could see.
What do you want to see? What will you use your sight for?